Wota in Translation

Henkka: This one might require a bit of explanation. “Atarimae taisou” (“obvious gymnastics“) is a sketch created by the Japanese comic duo COWCOW. The AKB fans among you might know it from their Request Hour Day 1 this year. It’s very, very silly and it’s a prime example of very “Japanese” type of humor, so the joke may not be instantly funny to you. It’s basically a song where they sing about… well… stuff that is obvious. See this to see COWCOW themselves do it. Just to translate a couple of the versions they do in that video to give you an idea:

• “Move your right leg, move your left leg — that’s how you walk! ♪“
• “Bend both your legs at the knee — that’s how you sit down! ♪“
• “A person walks up to you and gets too close — it pisses you off! ♪“
• “When you go second in a game of rock-paper-scissors — you’ll win! ♪“

This thread features the same sketch as applied to things within H!P. Be aware that I won’t try to match the lyrics to the melody of the song, I’ll just translate the meanings as-is. Here we go…

3：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 21:46:00.63 ID:0
If there’s influenza and you leave it alone — it’ll spread! ♪

4：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 21:47:21.61 ID:0
Graduations, auditions, graduations, auditions — graduations! ♪

7：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 21:51:25.21 ID:0
Shit shit shit shit, shit shit shit shit — office! ♪

8：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 21:54:50.79 ID:0
Tiny breasts tiny breasts, tiny breasts tiny breasts — tiny breasts! ♪

9：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 21:59:45.73 ID:0
When you put Sayashi near Michishige — peep shots! ♪

10：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:01:23.84 ID:0
You’d be cute if you lost some weight — Zukki! ♪

13：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:02:58.13 ID:0
You’d be pretty if you lost some weight — Maasa! ♪

15：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:04:40.82 ID:0
Cute if they lost some weight, pretty if they lost some weight — they won’t! ♪

12：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:02:03.39 ID:0
Fukumura Mizuki, Fukumura Mizuki — Fukumura! ♪

17：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:07:31.12 ID:0
If you complain about Terada’s songs — you’re fired! ♪

19：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:08:02.32 ID:0
Refunds if your favorite member is absent — there are none! ♪

21：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:11:00.33 ID:0
If you leave a bentou near Ishida — it’ll disappear! ♪

34：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:25:07.65 ID:0
These are too funny.

56：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:45:58.93 ID:0
The lady selling the goods — I fell in love with her! ♪

58：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:46:59.17 ID:0
Families at the family seats — there are none! ♪

61：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:48:23.48 ID:0
When the person in the seat next to you is a girl — you’ll want to check her out! ♪

62：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:48:27.38 ID:0
No matter what you use her for — Yasuda’s funny! ♪

71：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:52:06.44 ID:0
You felt uneasy when they added a loli into the group — now she’s your oshi! ♪

79：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:54:32.78 ID:0
A pink T-shirt and a pink bandana — they’re balding! ♪

81：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:55:24.65 ID:0
Wota T’s, wota T’s, filling my drawer — can’t throw ’em away! ♪

82：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:56:07.63 ID:0
Risako’s hair color, what‘s next? — Can’t wait to see! ♪

83：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:56:08.46 ID:0
Guys, guys, that salesgirl — I like her too much! ♪

85：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 22:57:52.34 ID:0
Your eyes when you’re looking at the trainees — they’re focused! ♪

133：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:21:08.41 ID:0
Bought an expensive ticket, my oshi is absent — I want to cry! ♪

134：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:21:37.54 ID:0
When you come out as a wota at work — they’ll be disgusted! ♪

154：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:33:45.46 ID:0
Miyabi-chan’s huge breasts — where are they? ♪

162：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:39:06.20 ID:0
Ishida Ayumi’s birthday cake is — too small! ♪

174：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:48:06.61 ID:0
From the very first song of the concert — it stinks! ♪

175：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:48:38.77 ID:0
Yuukarin and Kamei Eri — aren’t there! ♪

189：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/12(土) 23:59:11.33 ID:0
Our eyes met, she smiled at me — just my imagination! ♪

200：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/13(日) 00:11:17.71 ID:0
Makoto and Tsunku, Hatake and Taisei — Sharan Q! ♪

208：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/13(日) 00:23:26.09 ID:0
“An important announcement“, “an important announcement” — ahh, so nervous! ♪

209：名無し募集中。。。：2013/01/13(日) 00:25:40.47 ID:0
Momusu on TV for the first time in a while — LOVE Machine! ♪

217：過去と未来と交信する男 ◆0d6BWgzbeA ：2013/01/13(日) 01:22:42.62 ID:0
Everyone but me is a disgusting wota — eww! ♪

Henkka: >7 is my favorite.

Source: http://oha2.blog.fc2.com/blog-entry-643.html (jp)